3 relationship tips on how to survive the family mayhem this Xmas
As the festive season approaches and excitement levels rise it can be a time of chaos and turmoil for many people.
Being around family and extended family when we have old traumas and ‘buttons’ being pushed can often end in either ugly disagreements and or biting our tongue and suppressing what we really feel, which leaves us feeling unappreciated or not acknowledged.
Let alone the pressure we feel in intimate relationships and families with young children having to get through all the normal everyday things but also having to organize more meals, housework and shopping.
There is the added pressure of buying things for people that they don’t need with money we don’t have and feeling obliged to provide when sometimes already struggling to fund our current lifestyles.
If our current relationship isn’t at its best then the added pressure of family and festive commitments may take its toll when we aren’t feeling as valued as we would like.
Tip 1: Remember to take time out for yourself and breath. Often we get so caught up in running around being busy we forget to actually look after ourselves. This then affects the way we interpret others and what they say. We will interpret something very differently if we are calm rather than worked up or stressed out.
Tip2: Always try to see the positive in something. We live in a totally balanced universe and when we get lost in the negative we often only see that. Energy flows where attention goes ... better to have positive in us than negative. If people are being negative around us then leave it with them. Not nastily but with compassion for their being so stuck
Tip 3: “But for the grace of god there go I”
Remember everyone is doing their best most of the time with the current state of awareness. We all perceive things through our own filters and it’s often frustrating for us to not feel heard valued or understood but don’t take it personally. Remember what this time of year is meant to be all about. Not money, presents or food but connection with our friends and whanau.
And remember presence is far more valuable to someone than presents
If this was of interest to you, come along to Dean's Conscious Relationships workshop with Beatrice Alexander at Soul Centre on Sunday December 17th...